a few days back, i finished reading Maus, a two part graphic novel series that talks about the holocaust. I was so touched and deeply disturbed. I never thought of human hatred as such a potent force, capable of causing so much destruction and despair. I also never thought of the tenacity that we can show in times of such despair. human beings are capable of so much compassion and so much love, yet our hatred knows no bounds either. To treat people like the way the jews were treated is simply not human. to think that so many people went along with it and let it happen is also such a shame and such a disgrace. yet we seem to learn nothing from history. you would think that after such a great tragedy, the world would never let anything quite like that happen but think again. the genocides in Bosnia, Sudan and many other places suggest otherwise. looks like we don't learn anything from the past. It scares me to think that fellow human beings are capable of such carnal acts. hatered is very very scary

life sometimes more than sucks! today i realized that other than my folks, my sis and bro inlaw, no one else will be coming to drop me to the airport and that just sucks! you know why because i have more than been there for my friends. i am sometimes an ass

I have been home for almost 20 days now. I have now observed one thing. The children upstairs are way too quiet... for a boy of 7 and a girl of 12, they are surprisingly quiet... they don't fight with each other loudly, they don't play together or atleast i think they don't because i can't hear a thing.
They watch tv for half an hour everyday,.. i think they're angels....Now it was quite different with me and my sis...
As kids, although the age gap between us was 6 years, we did play with each other until my sis was around 14. We fought a LOT... but we would also get along wonderfully well and play house, barbies or space adventures... We fought about the names our barbies had.. my sis always came up with these wonderful names and i always wanted the name she took up.... we fought over whose barbie's boyfriend was archie and whose was reggie.... i had no clue about who archie or reggie was but i wanted what she wanted. we fought over barbie furniture, clothes... everything possible.. but we always comprmised and then played with each other and had so much fun.
At home, during holidays my mom wouldn't even make us pick up our toys. A barbie house set up on the floor would stay like that for days. She was such a good sport. She instructed the maid to sweep around it....
One more game that my sis and i loved playing was library... Once in a while we would arrnage the heaps of books we had and number them and catalogue them and pretend that we had our own library... that was the best. we would just sit around reading. Our mom pretty much let us to do what we pleased during the holidays. we never cleaned our rooms or cupboards. It was a nice mess and we had lots of fun fighting and playing. Just before the holidays would end, our mom would come, dump our clothes from the cupboard and make sure we arranged them...
and now I see these kids and their room looks so clean and neat, nothing out of place, no raised voices, no fights, perfect little angels who always listen to their mum and i can't help but feel a little sad for the fun they are missing out on.

So i have decided that I will be attending the mason school of business from August... I fell in love with the school and after talking to the current students, I feel that it is a very happy place. So really looking forward to going there. My journey up to this point has been interesting. The first time I realized that I wanted to do an MBA was in the third semester of engineering. Gautam and I were sitting below the big banyan tree in the gangothri campus, and he was telling me that he wanted to do his PhD in AI techniques. I said I wasn't sure and our conversation proceeded something like this. I so clearly remember.
me: I think i want to do an MBA... I'm not sure... I really haven't thought this through.
gautam: well.... don't you think it's time for you to put some thought into it... don't tell me you want to stop after just doing your B.E...
me: you know what, don't tell anyone but I'm secretly very ambitious
gautam: why secretly? you should be ambitious.
me:i don't know... i never tell anyone these things....
can't believe I told you!
gautam: what's the big deal..... by the way you ought to start putting some effort to learn about what you want to do. talk to people, read...
me: ya ya....

I think I was 12 years old when my mom told me something that I will never forget. I had gotten mediocre marks in my annual exams and had just received a long lecture from my class teacher about how indifferent I was becoming towards everything. I had also been yelled at quite badly by my dad and was in no mood to listen to another lecture. My mom and I were sitting by the swimming pool and this is exactly what she said to me..
"So you had a lot of fun last year in class I guess...I know how nice it is when boys pay you a lot of attention, when they want to talk to you and be with you but I'll tell you a secret... when you study well and do smart things, smarter boys will want to be around you... so think about it."
This was something that I never forgot...For us at home it was important to be smart. Smart meant thinking before you spoke, smart meant trying your best even if you sometimes failed, smart meant sticking to rules. We could and still can talk to our mother about anything. She never stopped us from asking questions.Sex, boys, ambition, marriage, children, life... she always tells me what she thinks. Always honest.Never apologetic.
I believe i have made smart choices in life and that is why I am happy today. I also trust myself to do the smart thing in future also. This is something I learnt from my folks

I was watching Jhalak today on Sony and for the first time in my life I teared up, watching a dance. it was a performance by Baichung Bhutia and his choreographer and it was about a woman who has suffered from physical abuse. The choreography was just outstanding. It moved me to tears. The message was conveyed so clearly. it was beautiful!
While changing channels I saw Barkha Dutt's interview with Priyanka Gandhi. Never have I been that impressed. What I saw was a woman who is inteligent, cultured, dignified and astute.
Priyanka Gandhi came across as a woman who is sincere and honest. Her answers and opinions about non violence, her family and politics demonstrated the deep understanding she has of herself, her country and her family. The BJP talks a lot about nationalism, patriotism and Indianness but not one of their leaders have conveyed what Priyanka did in that interview. Her views and understanding about these matters can shame any 80 year old "grass roots","country loving" neta.
Catch the repeat telecast of the interview if posible and you'll know what I'm talking about.


here's the video of priyanka's interview

there's a lot of talk about how women make really bad bosses. I have to disagree... I've had 4 supervisors over the last 22 months and 2 of them have been women. I have loved working for both of them. they were both thoroughly professional, extremely demanding and extremely fair.
Unlike the popular myth that women hate to see other women in leadership roles, both of them encouraged more girls in the team to take up leadership roles. This does not mean that all women are like that. it's just that i'm telling you that there a re very nice women who make great bosses and reading about them might just open your mind a little. both these women have been great role models and i hope to be like them someday too. The amount of positive energy that they have, the incredible vibe that they give out is amazing.

Applying to US business schools can be very draining. it's a crazy process. Once the applications are complete, the wait itself is horrible. But the whole process has been very rewarding for me and I am almost sure which school I will be joining. It forces you to look deep within yourself and understand and analyze your strengths and weakness closely. I have learnt a lot about myself and will soon tell you more about it....:)